Guilt is for the birds, right? Yet, we humans don’t leave the house without putting on a nice layer of remorse about something or another. My first memory of guilt is from Disney World, age kindergarten. I threw up on the trolley to Epcot Center after eating a burrito. It was the onions (I suffered from taste aversion of onions well into adulthood, by the way).
But I felt terrible because my parents had shelled out all this dough for a nice trip to Disney. And I kinda ruined at least a few parts. I might have been having some selfish child tantrums, too, about not getting what I wanted, but I mostly remember the burrito incident.
That seems like silly guilt, probably, because all of us have much, much bigger issues to be guilty about. Finances. School. Work. Marriage. Parenting. Family. War. Famine.
We get up in the morning and read the latest issues online or get pings on our phones about breaking news or we might even turn on the TV and hear all the terrible things we’re forced to hear because of our 24-hour society—and through all of these actions of receiving information we are immediately tied to the guilt of others that we innately connect with and somehow take on ourselves.
Today, we wake up and slather our brains and hearts in guilt just like slathering our armpits with deodorant. So not only do we have our personal manias, but the manias of others, too. Don’t believe me? What about sympathy posts on Facebook? Don’t tell me you don’t reply or read them. And you usually feel something real about them. Don’t tell me you don’t wait for continuous updates of this nature on the reality TV that is now TV… We feel the guilt of those reality TV stars on the Real Housewives. We tune in week after week for more. It’s like cheese dip.
Guilt is good for lots of things, though. It forces deadlines to be met and weight to be lost. It forces important causes to be recognized and donations to be made (especially when you’re checking out at Safeway). I’m sure it does much more but I’m a little tired right now from staying awake all night because I feel guilty about not writing on my blog enough and staying in tune with my writing.
It’s clear that I’m right on with my guilty instincts and intrinsic need to torture myself when I get out of line and stop keeping up with the dishes. If only it could be packaged and sold, surely we’d buy it in droves. What if it could be applied like mascara or shot into our heads like Botox?
I see it now! For us: guaranteed to make you lose weight or never forget to wash your kid’s favorite stuffed bear. For them: A perfect new way to further control consumer behavior.
Guilt. Don’t leave home without it.
